Hera and Aphrodite: Mishaps in Matrimony

Beginning the journey to learn about the various, and often contradictory, myths has exposed just how little I know about the different gods and goddesses. In particular, I thought Zeus had a different moral compass with a behavior that modeled a more traditional idea of honor. I thought of Hera as composed, and a respected Queen as the wife of Zeus. I did not realize Aphrodite was married. I always assumed (incorrectly), that she was the beautiful free spirit who inspired but did not participate in matrimony. To add to the intrigue, I have become aware of the lack of cannon in the mythological stories themselves. This is where the contradictions, inconsistencies, and various perspectives come from. Because there is no cannon, there is no way to declare with any certainty which telling is the original one. However, one can deduce from the more prevalent myths that the occupation of the role of wife by both Hera and Aphrodite has many similarities. They have similar origins at the hand of Zeus. While their methodology is different, the chaos created by their wifely circumstances is palpable. Although these similarities exist, the favorability enjoyed by Aphrodite is notably different from that offered to Hera.  

Statue of Hera
The Campana Hera, a Roman copy of a Hellenistic original, from the Louvre

The myths (and subsequent consequences) revolve around the desires of Zeus. Far from the benevolent and chivalrous gentleman, Zeus is nothing if not a take what he wants by any mean necessary deity. Procuring Hera as his seventh wife (although I confess to being a bit confused about how that works in the cosmic timeline) is no exception. I assume that Hera found benefit in being Zeus’ sister since it was he that brought her and the rest of their siblings back from the stomach of their father, Kronos. However, as a wife, it would appear that Hera was reluctant. Not one to take no for an answer, Zeus transformed himself into a cuckoo bird in order to entice Hera to bring him close to herself. The seduction worked and they married. This would seem to be the perfect role for the goddess of marriage (Roman and Roman 12). Unfortunately, the rampant promiscuity of her husband led to many difficulties. Hera is often portrayed enraged and jealous, going to treacherous and murderous ends in attempts to punish both her husband and his consorts. 

One such attempt occurred after the birth of Athena. Because of a prophesy, Zeus swallowed Athena’s mother, Metis, while she was pregnant with the goddess. Athena was later born in epic goddess fashion, full formed and fully ready for battle straight from the head of her father. While not technically a result of adultery (Metis and Zeus were married at the time), the birth of a child that was not hers infuriated Hera. I would suppose that after many slights, transgressions, and disloyalties, Hera would find it impossible to endure any encroachments on her position as the current bearer of Zeus’ children. In retaliation, Hera brought forth a child on her own. In keeping with Hera’s commitment to fidelity, she brought forth her son Hephaistos without participation from Zeus or any other entity. Unfortunately for Hera, Hephaistos was not the specimen Athena was. Where Athena was formidable and grand, Hephaistos was anything but. In her frustration, Hera cast her son from Mount Olympus. As one might imagine, this caused a great resentment in Hephaistos. In retaliation, he fashioned a throne designed to trap his mother in unbreakable bonds (Hansen and Hansen 50).  

Now, whatever Zeus was, willing to allow his wife to remain bound to a chair was not one of them. As Hephaistos was the only one who could free Hera, Zeus offered Aphrodite in marriage to whomever succeeded in convincing the disgruntled son to set his mother free. Ares, Aphrodite’s lover, attempted the mission and failed. Dionysus did not. Disliked by Hera himself, the god of wine convinced the craftsman god that the hand of Aphrodite was worth freeing the queen goddess. Hephaistos agreed and Dionysus found Hera’s favor and Hephaistos Aphrodite’s bed (Theoi Greek Mythology). 

Now, like Hera, Aphrodite found herself in a marriage not of her choosing. Also, like Hera, this arrangement left Aphrodite with a disposition for rebellion. Unlike Hera, however, Aphrodite did not feel compelled to maintain her fidelity to her husband. Instead, as the goddess of love, evidently regardless of martial disposition, Aphrodite and Ares continued their passionate love affair. It did not take long for Hephaistos to become aware of the duplicity. In retaliation, he devised a plan to catch the two lovers in the act and exposed their deceit to all the gods and goddess (Hansen and Hansen 113-114).  

The consequences of an unhappy home life for both goddesses were not limited to only the aforementioned examples. Both goddesses developed reputations for disruption that can logically tie back to their dissatisfaction with their husbands. It is important to note that the jealousy, trickery, and vengeance employed by Hera and Aphrodite are not particular to them. On the contrary, gods and goddess have displayed common characteristics of heightened emotions, sensitivity to slights, jealousy, and a desire for swift retribution when they feel as if they disrespected (Hansen and Hansen 35). However, as Hera is the goddess of marriage and Aphrodite the goddess of love, their behavior in the role of wife coincided directly with their respective honors. Therefore, Zeus’ infidelity is intolerable to Hera while remaining faithful in a loveless marriage was impossible for Aphrodite.  

It is easy to dismiss these love affairs as benign. Really, how much harm can come from people, deity or mortal, falling in love?

April Trepagnier

Perhaps because love is viewed as an invigorating emotion evoking thoughts of blooming flowers and young lovers while marriage is an institution for the adult and settled, the interferences of Aphrodite are viewed with less condemnation that those of Hera. Aphrodite was notorious for creating love affairs between gods and mortals to satisfy her amusement. It is easy to dismiss these love affairs as benign. Really, how much harm can come from people, deity or mortal, falling in love? Well, turns out it is a lot actually. Most notable was the Trojan War.  

While the epic of the Trojan War is often told and relatively well known, the genesis of the event is lesser explored and sometimes debated. One version suggests that Aphrodite’s meddling in the amorous affections of mortals and gods had created unforeseen consequences in the area of the resulting children. Real emotion found its way into some of these god-parent/demigod-offspring relationships. Because the demigods were mortal, this caused great strife for their immortal parents. Zeus was ready to see this era come to an end. He then employed Eris and a golden apple and counted on the vanity of the goddess to do its work. And it did. Tasking Paris with the responsibility of awarding the apple to the most beautiful goddess, Athena, Hera, and Aphrodite all made offers to be chosen. Aphrodite once again used the powers of desire, promising Paris the hand of Helen of Troy. This was the selected offer, and she won the golden apple from Paris thus infuriating Hera and Athena (Hansen and Hansen 82).  

Because there are a few events that occur in between the golden apple and the actual battles, it is easy to forget that Aphrodite had a hand in the mayhem. Aphrodite probably benefits from equal parts of romantic ideations and distance in proximity from initial cause to final result as she does not typically reveal her dissatisfaction with her marriage in direct relation to her husband. Hera routinely chooses a different method. Her interventions are, as one would expect of the goddess of marriage, directly aimed at the infidelity of her husband. She was nearly successful with her creation of Typhon. A child Hera brought forth on her own, Typhon was arguably the most formidable monster in mythology. Hera’s intention was for her son to overthrow her husband, thus freeing her from his power and punishing him for his infidelity. It nearly worked until Zeus overtook the monster to end the battle (Hansen and Hansen 233-234).  

More often, however, Hera is not quite so direct, choosing to take aim at the those around Zeus instead of the god himself. As such, there are typically relatively innocent women (even Hera fell victim to Zeus’ trickery), and children involved. Hera attempted to kill the infant Herakles, son of Zeus and Alkmene. She tricks Semele, mother of Dionysos, into destroying herself with Zeus’ radiance (Hansen and Hansen 187-188). This victimology rarely lends itself to sympathetic ideals. The result is a harsher view of Hera than Aphrodite experiences.  

Although Hera is considered strong, beautiful, and desirable, she is also characterized as a bitter housewife fueled by jealousy and overcome by pettiness. It occurred to me that this could be the very reason Hephaistos was born slighter in stature, weak, and unattractive. I think that there could be an argument made that Hera’s son is the embodiment of her inner angst. If, in mythological genealogy, like begets like, and Hephaistos comes from Hera alone at a particular time and for the express purpose of retaliating against Zeus for the birth of Athena, then it stands to reason that this would be the child Hera brings forth. Whether this is the actual cause of Hephaistos infirmary, of course I cannot know. However, it is symbolic of the typical way in which Hera and Aphrodite are regarded differently in their wifely roles considering the similarities in their situations.  

When one is considering the idea of “wife” and what that looks like in the context of mythological deities, it is often difficult to reconcile the manipulation, force, and aggression utilized when dealing with matters typically viewed as more romantic. However, it would appear that the deities are no less immune to drama created by emotional and physical desire than mortals. Hera, the Queen of the gods and Aphrodite, arguably the most well-known goddess are not so powerful as to be immune to the consequences of gods, more specifically, Zeus, behaving badly. Both goddesses were manipulated in their role as wife. True to their natures, these manipulations were answered with matronly punishment and seductive cuckolding. While both women may have desired to illuminate the more positive qualities of their honors, the lack of fidelity and passion prevented this for each of them respectively. While both women acted out against perceived wrongs, Hera’s outbursts, whether warranted or not, will always appear to be less flattering than Aphrodite’s indiscretions.  

Work Cited

Hansen, William F., and William F. Hansen. Classical Mythology: a Guide to the Mythical World of the Greeks and Romans. Oxford University Press, 2005.  

Roman, Luke, and Monica Roman. Aphrodite to Zeus: an Encyclopedia of Greek and Roman Mythology. Checkmark Books, 2011.  

“Theoi Greek Mythology.” THEOI GREEK MYTHOLOGY – Exploring Mythology in Classical Literature & Art, www.theoi.com/.